Sylar¹ and I have a lot in common, it occurred to me yesterday. Except I’m not a super-hero (nor a super-villain, for that matter) and I don’t slice people’s foreheads open and I don’t have caterpillars for eyebrows².
Poor Heroes – they’ve had about a zillion plots, loose ends dangle like frayed wires, they drop characters and whole stories without looking back. For some reason (let’s just call it a Lost-shaped hole in our lives), my husband and I spent several summer evenings watching every Heroes episode they’ve made thus far. We walked away confused, yet mildly intrigued, by the entire thing.
Sylar was one of the more intriguing characters, at least back in season one. Back then, he was this power-hungry murderer with no remorse. These days, he’s a lot less interesting. The writers are basically toying with motivations like “I’m a product of the circumstances around me, I’m a victim, therefore I slice people’s heads open,” while in the meantime giving him lines fit for a doofus.
So, a couple of days ago, I was toodling along the highway at a 30mph pace³ and for some reason, thought of Sylar. Though I am not a fan of his reasoning – victim or not, it is not okay to eat people’s brains – a small thought formed in my head. Perhaps I, too, am a victim of my circumstances! Perhaps my lack of patience with stupid drivers is merely the result of many, many, many experiences with people who should never, ever steer a vehicle.
For example: on the day this thought popped in for a visit, I’m on my way to a friend’s house (a little late, which made things worse). I’m toodling not by choice, but because there is a thousand-year-old lady “driving” the ancient car in front of me, with her blinker flashing left. She swerves left, then back again, then she veers toward the line…but it seems she has no intention of turning. I’m so close behind her, I can see her reach to the lever beside her steering wheel. The blinker flashes right momentarily, then switches back to left - at which point the windshield wipers also begin flailing about. By the way, it was a hundred degrees with no clouds in the wide, blue sky. Eventually, I made a break for it and passed her, as did a long line of other victims. The wipers wiped and the blinker blinked the entire time I was behind her.
I could type four different examples from the past 48 hours of things like this†! I’ll spare you, but seriously – I’m losing patience for a reason, people! If anyone knows of a place where all the drivers are kind and competent, please let me know and I’ll be on the next flight.
¹Villain-extraordinaire from Heroes, played by Zachary Quinto, in case you aren’t familiar.
³Speed limit? Sixty.
†Man wearing the eyepatch, I’m referring to you. People make mistakes – the guy in front of you hardly seemed to care that you ran into his back bumper. What worries me is that you didn’t even notice you’d hit him!